Thailand, We Have Notes

Love ya, Thailand! But every country can benefit from constructive feedback, yes?

Brent and I just spent four months living in Thailand, and we absolutely loved it. Wonderful people, delicious food, and stunning scenery — what’s not to like?

Well, maybe a few things.

So, Thailand, with apologies for sounding presumptuous, we have some “notes.” But Brent’s dad always said if you’re saying something negative, you should also say something nice.

With that in mind, here’s a list of things we loved about your homeland — and some things we think could stand a little improvement.

---

Love the temples … but less in love with the treacherous sidewalks.

There are more than 40,000 temples in Thailand, with some 30,000 of them still in use.

Many of them are spectacular — and demonstrate the Thai people’s love of their religion.

But when a visitor makes their way to said temples, they need to be very careful not to twist an ankle, break a leg, or fall into a gaping hole never to be heard from again. Because there are broken and cracked and hole-y sidewalks all over the place.

A country that does temples this fantastically can surely manage better sidewalks, no?

NOTE: Maybe spend a little less money on temples and a little more on sidewalks?

---

Love the amazing bathrooms … but less in love with using toilet paper to dry my hands.

Thailand has some incredible bathrooms. We saw a bathroom made entirely of gold, and a bathroom with trees growing between the urinals. Since many bathrooms are open-air, the views from the men’s room urinals are often glorious.

Alas, Thailand also frequently offers only toilet paper to dry your hands.

No, seriously, rather than a dispenser of paper-towels near the sinks, there is often a dispenser of…toilet paper. When you dry your hands with toilet paper, it immediately dissolves, and you end up with what feels like two hands full of wet papier-mâché.

NOTE: Even those hand-dryers that sound like a jet taking off are better than toilet paper for drying one’s hands. So let’s leave the toilet paper in the stalls where it belongs.

---

Love the food … but less in love with your disregard of our spiciness requests.

Thai cuisine is among Brent’s and my favorite in the world. That said, we’re not always crazy about the level of spiciness, especially when we specify “one star” or “just a little spicy,” and we get something that requires a visit to the emergency room.

If we’d wanted to suck on a blow torch, we would have asked to suck on a blow torch.

NOTE: Dear Thailand, I know you can’t believe how bland we tourists like our food, but if you’re going to ask us how spicy we want it, please listen to what we say.

---