Great post, Brent! Having lived there for 20 years, I’m happy to confirm that your made up facts are almost real facts. It can definitely feel that way.
One small word of caution though. If you do figure out how to survive the cold so you can live there forever, be prepared for the fact that you will never be perceived by the locals as “one of them”.
I have a Norwegian name, learned to speak the language without an accent, I’m white and have blue eyes. Still, after two decades, when colleagues introduced me to their friends they always said: “Meet Paul, he’s from Canada…
I loved this so much. And, if memory serves, Norway may have a problem with alcoholism if you need another notch in the imperfect belt. And isn’t whaling still a thing? The issue I see for all the homogenous countries is how they manage when immigrants and refugees create a more diverse society. (Answer: not well). There’s clearly more to ponder on the hallucination of Norwegian perfection.
These are excellent and important points. It’s easy for those of us who wish (and have the resources) to choose an idyllic life; admittedly, those features are attractors for me. But, at this stage in life, I am fed by diversity - culturally, ethnically - and the lack of sunlight is a total dealbreaker.
This was so enjoyable to read, so funny, and to top it off now I want to move to Norway to nitpick their perfection! Ok, probably more so to bask in it than nitpick it. I'm just jealous!
Love, love, love this recap of Norway!! And it’s funny, that was this was my final conclusion with Norway—all the positive attributes, but the oil thing stuck with me. I’m sure they will figure out the green solutions, as Scandinavians do like nature & tidy.
Don’t know if you’ve ever watched the Neflix series, “Lilyhammer,” but watching this fictional series there are depictions of their prison system (which I don’t know, but wouldn’t be surprised!), I thought—geez even their prisons are nice! (The series with Steven Van Zandt, formerly with Bruce Springstein), the story is a New York mobster who goes into hiding in rural Lillehammer in Norway after testifying against his former associates. It is funny to think of the stark differences in life between the 2 cities & ways:)
I love the humor in this. I read it with great interest because I lived in Sweden for five years and the darkness almost killed me. I didn't even get a chance to visit this neighboring country because it was and still is so expensive. I did have a Norwegian friend visit me but she has dark hair and didn't look like a model 😆. Well, I think you nailed it with the hypocrisy on their environmental practice. Also, in homogeneous countries like this (and much of Scandinavia but Sweden has become much more diverse in the last two decades or so), visiting as a tourist is vastly different from living there as an immigrant. Of course, I am an Asian woman and will forever be treated as a second-class citizen there. You might have an entirely different experience altogether.
I hope that when you go to Denmark you visit Aarhus. That was the most wonderful place I ever experienced in Scandinavia, but so expensive. I was there on business, and was given 1000 euros for my week’s stay there for spending money for meals, etc, and turned out I needed every penny, even eating pizza at places where students frequented.
Moesgaard Museum and forest, the reconstructed old town Den Gamle By, the Latin Quarter in Old Town, Dokk1. I spent most of my time around the university for work stuff, where there were loads of lovely cafes/coffeeshops. Aarhus is in just a beautiful setting....I would move there in a heartbeat.
Midsommar was awful. Agreed. I never involuntarily rolled my eyes and laughed so much in my life. Maybe better to approach it as a comedy, in some kind of meta sense or parody or........ something......
Dig in to the history of Norwegian Black Metal, if you're looking for dark and unsettling. There's the secret you're determined to find. :D
One year I was determined to discover new artists and genres of music. Somehow I randomly selected Norwegian Black Metal. I made it about 5 minutes and decided I didn't want to be THAT musically literate.
Having been there in 1991, I would agree to most of your points. Norway is stunning- the scenery and the people. I still have a friend in Oslo and I was just thinking a few months ago that it was time to visit again.
As far as the cold, you do get used to it. I lived in northern Canada for 3 years and although it does take some getting used to, you do adapt.
Summer daylight, on the other hand, is a little more challenging.
Interesting about adapting, and also the light. I think that would be the hardest part of winter too. Never really got used to six hours of daylight in Seattle.
I tried to learn Norwegian as a pandemic activity (it’s my ancestry), but I can’t imagine being able to use it, even in Norway, given how perfect everyone’s English is. Also, re: oil, highly recommend Okkupert (Occupied), a Norwegian series that imagines a near future in which Norway plans to slash oil production for environmental reasons and Russia essentially takes over.
Brilliant piece! Hope you had time to get out to the Vigiland Sculpture Park. But don’t go after dark, that’s when the statuary comes to life and you will see the DARK SIDE!
Great post, Brent! Having lived there for 20 years, I’m happy to confirm that your made up facts are almost real facts. It can definitely feel that way.
One small word of caution though. If you do figure out how to survive the cold so you can live there forever, be prepared for the fact that you will never be perceived by the locals as “one of them”.
I have a Norwegian name, learned to speak the language without an accent, I’m white and have blue eyes. Still, after two decades, when colleagues introduced me to their friends they always said: “Meet Paul, he’s from Canada…
Ohhh, I'm sorry. I think that's true in a lot of European countries. Incredible!
I loved this so much. And, if memory serves, Norway may have a problem with alcoholism if you need another notch in the imperfect belt. And isn’t whaling still a thing? The issue I see for all the homogenous countries is how they manage when immigrants and refugees create a more diverse society. (Answer: not well). There’s clearly more to ponder on the hallucination of Norwegian perfection.
It's an issue, but they seem to be dealing with it better than the rest of Europe. hehe
Thanks!
Yes they deal with it by making it very difficult to immigrate there.
These are excellent and important points. It’s easy for those of us who wish (and have the resources) to choose an idyllic life; admittedly, those features are attractors for me. But, at this stage in life, I am fed by diversity - culturally, ethnically - and the lack of sunlight is a total dealbreaker.
Fair take.
Loved the humor in this post.
Appreciate that!
This was so enjoyable to read, so funny, and to top it off now I want to move to Norway to nitpick their perfection! Ok, probably more so to bask in it than nitpick it. I'm just jealous!
haha yeah I started off nitpicking too, then just gave up.
I’ve never been to Norway and I loved every word of this ♥️. Thank you for the laughs🤣
You're very welcome!
"mostly because in the faux-1950s, she doesn’t have to download a whole new app for every goddamn little thing"
My favorite line in the whole piece, as we just got a new dishwasher that wants us to download a freaking app. WHY
Right?? 😂
"Social trust" is an interesting phrase. It certainly seems to be something that is lacking in the US right now.
Isn't is perfect? It's a sociological term i heard recently. And yes, it is absolutely gone in America, isn't it?
Love, love, love this recap of Norway!! And it’s funny, that was this was my final conclusion with Norway—all the positive attributes, but the oil thing stuck with me. I’m sure they will figure out the green solutions, as Scandinavians do like nature & tidy.
Don’t know if you’ve ever watched the Neflix series, “Lilyhammer,” but watching this fictional series there are depictions of their prison system (which I don’t know, but wouldn’t be surprised!), I thought—geez even their prisons are nice! (The series with Steven Van Zandt, formerly with Bruce Springstein), the story is a New York mobster who goes into hiding in rural Lillehammer in Norway after testifying against his former associates. It is funny to think of the stark differences in life between the 2 cities & ways:)
Oh I need to check it out! Not surprised in the least. 😍
I love the humor in this. I read it with great interest because I lived in Sweden for five years and the darkness almost killed me. I didn't even get a chance to visit this neighboring country because it was and still is so expensive. I did have a Norwegian friend visit me but she has dark hair and didn't look like a model 😆. Well, I think you nailed it with the hypocrisy on their environmental practice. Also, in homogeneous countries like this (and much of Scandinavia but Sweden has become much more diverse in the last two decades or so), visiting as a tourist is vastly different from living there as an immigrant. Of course, I am an Asian woman and will forever be treated as a second-class citizen there. You might have an entirely different experience altogether.
Of course, that's true, although I did talk to many many locals. Thank you!
I hope that when you go to Denmark you visit Aarhus. That was the most wonderful place I ever experienced in Scandinavia, but so expensive. I was there on business, and was given 1000 euros for my week’s stay there for spending money for meals, etc, and turned out I needed every penny, even eating pizza at places where students frequented.
Our upcoming cruise is stopping there for a day. Anything in particular you'd recommend?
Moesgaard Museum and forest, the reconstructed old town Den Gamle By, the Latin Quarter in Old Town, Dokk1. I spent most of my time around the university for work stuff, where there were loads of lovely cafes/coffeeshops. Aarhus is in just a beautiful setting....I would move there in a heartbeat.
Thanks!
Sounds lovely! 😍
Such a fun read! Norway just moved up on my list of places to visit.
🙂
YES! I am on board with all the conspiracies - Norway is too perfect! I desperately want to live there too.
I also heard that they just green lit a diapers for pigeons initiative too so that just confirms it.
😂
Midsommar was awful. Agreed. I never involuntarily rolled my eyes and laughed so much in my life. Maybe better to approach it as a comedy, in some kind of meta sense or parody or........ something......
Dig in to the history of Norwegian Black Metal, if you're looking for dark and unsettling. There's the secret you're determined to find. :D
It didn't seem to know WHAT is was. Was it a comedy? It seemed like Hereditary sort of made that work, but Midsommar just. Didn't. Work.
Haha. Will do!
One year I was determined to discover new artists and genres of music. Somehow I randomly selected Norwegian Black Metal. I made it about 5 minutes and decided I didn't want to be THAT musically literate.
😂😂😂
Great article!
Having been there in 1991, I would agree to most of your points. Norway is stunning- the scenery and the people. I still have a friend in Oslo and I was just thinking a few months ago that it was time to visit again.
As far as the cold, you do get used to it. I lived in northern Canada for 3 years and although it does take some getting used to, you do adapt.
Summer daylight, on the other hand, is a little more challenging.
Thank you!
Interesting about adapting, and also the light. I think that would be the hardest part of winter too. Never really got used to six hours of daylight in Seattle.
I tried to learn Norwegian as a pandemic activity (it’s my ancestry), but I can’t imagine being able to use it, even in Norway, given how perfect everyone’s English is. Also, re: oil, highly recommend Okkupert (Occupied), a Norwegian series that imagines a near future in which Norway plans to slash oil production for environmental reasons and Russia essentially takes over.
Yes, they switch back and forth seamlessly. It's so interesting!
I'll check it out...
Brilliant piece! Hope you had time to get out to the Vigiland Sculpture Park. But don’t go after dark, that’s when the statuary comes to life and you will see the DARK SIDE!
haha called it! They all come to life?
Actually our apartment was about two blocks away. Just FANTASTIC. We have an upcoming piece on the park and its history.
Sweet! Can’t wait to read it!