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Mindy Duryea's avatar

Mayonnaise on pizza? Disgusting. However, mayonnaise is one of my very favorite foods and I always feel a little sorry for people who don’t like it. Homemade mayo in France can be absolutely delicious on many things. But in the US, Duke’s in the south and Hellman’s (best foods) everywhere else… one of the best things to eat all summer is juicy tomato sandwich on often white but really any kind of bread with plenty of mayo is something I look forward to all year. I don’t eat bacon anymore but mayo on a BLT? Heaven. I also have an incredible recipe for cole slaw I make in summer that is mayo based… most Cole slaw is disgusting made with sugar and milk but people freak out when they taste mine… secret is mayo among several other things. My Swedish friend loves banana on pizza. Also gross but I guess it depends on what you grow up with. I also love béarnaise and hollandaise which are egg and butter instead of egg and oil. None of it good for you but can’t imagine life without them!

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Michael Jensen's avatar

I will agree that a bit of mayo -- a BIT! LOL -- on a BLT can be good. But otherwise, we must agree to disagree! :-)

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DenizB33's avatar

I don't know how mayonnaise evolved into the stuff that comes in toothpaste tubes in Europe, but I made my own once, with one egg, a bit of olive oil, and some Dijon mustard, and it was really tasty!

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Hmm, perhaps with some Dijon mustard, I could be enticed to try it!

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Evie's avatar

I make my own with cashews and love it. No egg or oil. Yummmm

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Hmmm. Sounds....unusual. :-)

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DenizB33's avatar

Ooh, that does sound good!

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Terrie's avatar

You are, like, the funniest guy on stack. At least to me.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Aww, thanks!

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Catherine's avatar

Mayonnaise on pizza is abominable. But then so is pineapple. I don’t like kewpie either it’s too sweet for me. But I have to admit a huge fondness for Lebanese garlic sauce, toum, which doesn’t have eggs so not sure it qualifies but once almost poisoned me simply because I ate FAR TOO MUCH OF IT on my shish. Worth it.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Hmmm, this Lebanese garlic sauce does sound intriguing...

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Catherine's avatar

It is divine. And keeps both flies and people at a distance if that is your wish……

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Michael Jensen's avatar

LOL LOL LOL

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Valerie Starr's avatar

Mayo is like man buns;permissible on only certain select items. (Only Chou Yun Fat, Samuari, Sumo wrestlers, and Jet Li are man bun certified). Likewise blt, egg salad , tuna salad, potato salad (my mom put vinegar on the potatoes first), and of course on leftover turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce sandwiches after thanksgiving. Otherwise keep your darn mayo off my food. There’s a reason Navin in Steve Martin’s The Jerk eats tuna/mayo on white bread…

And Kewpie has msg in it. So it’s out of my repertoire; anyway, Dukes is the best. No Sugar!!! And way better than Hellman’s (and I’m bilingual Yankee:Southern so I know from whence I speak. ) be that as it my I have at least 8 different kinds of mustard in my refrigerator condiment shelf. From Trader Joe’s yummy summer dill pickle mustard to my childhood favorite Mr.Mustard. Besides I bet those who adore mayo put ketchup on hot dogs . Oh the horror!!’

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Heidi's avatar

You had me at 'Chou Yun Fat' and 'Man Bun.' Perfect combo there!

I'm still a hard pass on mayo, but I like that you have exacting standards.

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Joe Prince's avatar

Michael, I adore you, but our paths have diverted on this one. (I will still keep my paid subscription, though. Just know I am sad.)

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Thanks! If too many people had threatened to cancel, I would've been forced to recant and probably even post a video of me eating spoonful after spoonful...

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Joe Prince's avatar

One must suffer for one’s art…. 😉😘

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Maybe I could cut off an ear instead?

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Joe Prince's avatar

Save that for when you and Brent are in Arles 🤣😉

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Tracey Whicker's avatar

I quite like Mayonaise in a chicken and lettuce sandwich but this has put me off it 🤣

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Michael Jensen's avatar

MY WORK HERE IS DONE!

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Tracey Whicker's avatar

😂

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Ashley W's avatar

Admittedly, I love mayonnaise but use it sparingly. I think we all have our food aversions. For me, it is hard boiled eggs. I can’t even look at them and it is a borderline phobia.

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Heidi's avatar

Same, Ashley, same. My food aversion is kale. I like to make it with loads of butter so it slides straight out of the pan and into the trash without any trouble at all. I don't care what anyone says, kale is bitter and nothing will change that.

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Ashley W's avatar

I understand. I want to like kale because it grows all year in my garden. However, even baby kale is fibrous and all the Shiatsu massage in the world is not going to make it tender. The only way I eat it is delicately fried in a tempura batter. I just took out my kale plants for something more worthwhile - pumpkins.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

They word is "sparingly." Just had a dish here in Seoul, Korea, that used mayo -- and not sparingly! LOL LOL

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Marc Paige's avatar

I thought I was the only one person in the world who felt this way about mayonnaise. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

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Michael Jensen's avatar

You are not! We are a mighty force to be reckoned with!

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Dave's avatar

Attended a 4th of July barbecue & for the first time I was offered a smear of mayo on my corn on the cob! I politely refused & asked if they had a wedge of lime to squeeze over my buttered cob. A tasty touch recommended by an Iranian friend.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

I can get behind the lime, but I might have asked for the jar of mayo and then hurled it over the fence.

Hmm, starting to see why don’t get invited to more parties…

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Debra O’Connor's avatar

Best summer sandwich: Sourdough bread, a swipe of Duke’s and thick slices of tomato straight in from the garden. For me, not the same without the mayo.

Also, really easy to make your own mayo using an immersion blender and a pint canning jar.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

I'd never heard of this tomato sandwich before and shall pretend I still haven't. LOL LOL

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Nolan Yuma's avatar

“Then again, Belgium is just France without Paris, Monet, or the Côte d'Azur — so my point still holds true.” I hope I'm you're only Belgian reader so you don't piss too many people off, haha! Mayonnaise is on everything in Belgium, though. It’s the worst place to get a “refreshing salad” cause it might come smothered in that artery-clogging thick slop. I'm a much bigger fan of Spanish ajoaciete, especially when they manage to pull off the thick texture with only olive oil and garlic.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Ha! I specifically thought of you when I wrote that line! LOL Thank god, I never encountered mayo on a salad. I might still be in recovery. As ajoaciete, I didn't hate that, probably because of all of the garlic!

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HNB's avatar

Oh no, Michael. I have always thought we are simpatico, aligned on most things. But, you have just given me a rude shock. Now wait, before you despair, I totally agree with you about the disgust factor about mayo on sushi, pizza and many other foods it does not belong on! Here in southern France, I gave in to my temptation to sushi, and then regretted it. I thought I avoided any sushi containing cream cheese (a huge NO in my book!) and mayo, but then the sushi rolls tasted suspiciously sweet somehow, and the condiments offered were not legitimate--sweet soy sauce vs. other soy sauce, and sweet chili sauce, which is to be avoided always. So, yeah, I see where you are coming from. But, good quality mayonnaise is a brilliant invention--potato salad, sandwiches, and yes, I even use it on hamburgers! Mayo plus garlic is God's gift--aioli! Which I would eat with almost anything it comes on/with. Cold, sliced leftover rib-eye steak with green beans and potatoes. Belgian frites. ANY frites! Tuna salad. The day-after-Thanksgiving sandwich with a hefty slice of home-roasted turkey, and maybe even a slice of cranberry sauce. Definitely stay away from the Asian mayo foods, which are just a sad commentary on globalism, and avoid anything called a "composed salad," but don't completely lose the faith!

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Oh and cream cheese in sushi is disgusting enough to warrant another article!

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Yes, mayo on a day-after-Thanksgiving turkey sandwich is quite tasty. And since you are actually in France, I also accept your other use of it, though am still suspicious. As for aioili, well, anything with garlic is pretty much acceptable!

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Ann Higgins's avatar

Agreed - sushi with mayo and/or cream cheese is the work of the devil.

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Jim's avatar

Well I am going to have to disagree. My partner feels as you do but I use it widely: I use it instead of butter to fry grilled cheese sandwiches; I rub a whole chicken with it before sliding it into the oven to bake; and I love it on mortadella and tomato sandwiches. I'll add dill and use it as a sauce for salmon. And I'll add it to cake mix for cakes. I also have 3 different kinds of Mayo in my fridge, including Kewpie. I suspect there's more Mayo in your food than is obvious at first glance. But since you like French fries and Mayo we can still be civil.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Yeeeees, we can be civil and I have heard of the cake thing. Since I probably couldn't taste it there. But rubbing it on a chicken? I assume your husband orders pizza -- without mayo! -- on those nights.

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Jim's avatar

I have to admit Mayo on pizza is a crime. The chicken he knows about and doesn't mind. You wouldn't be able to tell. In terms of my other uses, he takes sauce on the side or not at all....

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Lisa Andruszkow's avatar

I like mayonnaise on certain things. A sandwich, on a BLT, in potato salad (Yes, I'm one of those people lol), in egg salad. I have heard it is really good on a tomato sandwich, which is a Southern thing, I suppose.

But definitely not on pizza. That just sounds terrible!!! It's up there with using ranch dressing as the sauce base for pizza! I hate hot ranch dressing.

I do know someone who used to put sour cream on his spaghetti with red sauce. I don't know why he did it, but I found it gross and unappetizing to watch.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

A BLT, yes, I can see that. But I have yet to have a potato salad with it that I'll eat. The answer is NO! As for the sour cream spaghetti friend, I assume you ended that friendship, yes? :-)

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Lisa Andruszkow's avatar

Well, I don't see them much anymore and I also don't think they eat spaghetti anymore either. I would have said, back then, that sour cream was their mayo. It went on things it shouldn't have LOL

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Annette Laing's avatar

"Foodies love to talk about “mouthfeel.” This one made my mouth feel like puking." Laughed out loud at this zinger, Michael. I'm doing my usual thing of going on a tangent, to grumble about international pizza desecration, possibly including what Americans did to Italian pizza, but, ah, I'll just skip right to it: My fellow Brits putting corn (aka sweetcorn) on pizza. I thought that was gross even before I moved across the pond. On mayo? Mostly with you.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

Uggh, yes, I saw the sweetcorn while in the UK and thought, "Did someone need to get rid of that corn quickly?" Definitely, a no!

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Ann Higgins's avatar

Not this one. Strictly Italian style toppings here. Though saying that there was a pizzeria in Venice that used to serve a pizza topped with chips and for all I know still does. I suppose that might have come with mayo on top as the final insult.

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Michael Jensen's avatar

I SAW THE FRENCH FRIES ON PIZZA THING IN ITALY AND STILL HAVEN'T RECOVERED!!!!

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Annette Laing's avatar

Ann, not a Pizza Hut fan, then? :) I'm still trying to get past pizza served with garlic bread, although that has crossed the pond to the US as an option in some places. And (seriously!) thank you for reminding me that like everything else, food is constantly in flux, especially in the modern world, and that it's daft to be an authenticity snob (not that I'm saying that of you or Michael, I rush to add!). That's also why (an aside) this historian keeps traveling home every year, because otherwise, in the UK, I'm a time-traveler from the early 80s.

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Ann Higgins's avatar

Lol, I think the last time I was in Pizza Hut the pizzas came with coleslaw and baked potatoes! And I’m with you on the garlic bread too.

On the rare occasions I get up to London I feel like a time traveller - compared to what we have here in Cornwall it is light years away especially when it comes to food from other cultures. I sometimes fall asleep dreaming of the Chinese restaurants in Lyle Street!

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