A thousand yeses to having a diverse group of friends, and valuing them as they are. And it's hard to get that perspective from living in a bubble, whether we're talking Lubbock or Brooklyn. Thanks for the insights you give that come from *your* way of living.
I've often worried that my personal mantra of "human first, writer second" has held my own writing career back, but then realize that even thinking that isn't in line with my own values. It's great to have some space and distance to figure out what one's priorities actually are, isn't it?
I’ve been struck lately by how most of the people I know ended up with the lives they wanted or that fit their values/personality/ambitions, even if they might complain a bit or talk about other goals (that likely won’t happen bc they aren’t REALLY a priority). Good mirror for me to see myself and my “wish I coulds” as just “wellll maybe I don’t actually want (or deserve via hard work) to have that.”
Thanks for the thought-provoking piece. Here’s to having varied friends!
Hi Brent, I enjoyed this story and the title. In August we attended my nephews wedding south of Buffalo NY. I looked at the crowd and thought "we are all different but the same thru time"
It's heartwarming to hear from someone who has all different kinds of friends, not just ones who are reflections of their own selves. Everyone benefits by maintaining and valuing friendships that are diverse. Good for you!
This is so beautifully stated. My life hasn't turned out the way I expected, but even the difficult turns have made me who I am today, and I really like who I am today.
Thank you for showing us that a good life is what we make it, not the result of following someone else's plan.
I love this thoughtful look at your two friends, so very different and yet similar in their decency. The way you described each of them I immediately "got" them. There's such peace in acceptance without judgment in who we and are friends are. I admit, I'm still working on that.
A beautiful and thought-provoking piece. I think you're right about attitudes shifting as we get older - certainly this year more than ever before I've let go of long-held expectations and embraced the reality that what I have and do is enough. I'm so glad I found your and Michael's Substack, your posts are so touching and inspirational.
I always love hearing about how our different childhoods can shape us in different ways. For Example, Scott didn't have financial security or stability growing up so he went into Law Enforcement. Arial had the "silver spoon" which gave her the freedom to "explore" in non-traditional ways.
My own childhood, being raised around wilderness and nature has given me a connection to the natural world that I love to explore in my writing, which even that part of my life (writing) is an expression of my childhood. You mentioned a bit about your happy marriage and successful group of friends, then going on to becoming a nomad (very cool), but I would have loved to hear how even more far back this idea of being a nomad went in your life.
I really enjoy your writing, it's simple, it's clear, it's straightforward and no hint of pretentiousness that I get from some writers. It's always interesting to me how when we release the grasp on being successful, or being witty, or being clever, how drastically our writing improves.
How to Build a Life
I like the quiet wisdom of this piece. Thank you.
A deep sensitive beautifully articulated piece I needed to read today
The tapestry of life how it unfolds how our lives play out
A thousand yeses to having a diverse group of friends, and valuing them as they are. And it's hard to get that perspective from living in a bubble, whether we're talking Lubbock or Brooklyn. Thanks for the insights you give that come from *your* way of living.
I've often worried that my personal mantra of "human first, writer second" has held my own writing career back, but then realize that even thinking that isn't in line with my own values. It's great to have some space and distance to figure out what one's priorities actually are, isn't it?
Very nice!
I’ve been struck lately by how most of the people I know ended up with the lives they wanted or that fit their values/personality/ambitions, even if they might complain a bit or talk about other goals (that likely won’t happen bc they aren’t REALLY a priority). Good mirror for me to see myself and my “wish I coulds” as just “wellll maybe I don’t actually want (or deserve via hard work) to have that.”
Thanks for the thought-provoking piece. Here’s to having varied friends!
Great piece. I feel so calm and reflective after reading it.
Hi Brent, I enjoyed this story and the title. In August we attended my nephews wedding south of Buffalo NY. I looked at the crowd and thought "we are all different but the same thru time"
Keep Smiling Steve
It's heartwarming to hear from someone who has all different kinds of friends, not just ones who are reflections of their own selves. Everyone benefits by maintaining and valuing friendships that are diverse. Good for you!
This is so beautifully stated. My life hasn't turned out the way I expected, but even the difficult turns have made me who I am today, and I really like who I am today.
Thank you for showing us that a good life is what we make it, not the result of following someone else's plan.
I love this thoughtful look at your two friends, so very different and yet similar in their decency. The way you described each of them I immediately "got" them. There's such peace in acceptance without judgment in who we and are friends are. I admit, I'm still working on that.
A beautiful and thought-provoking piece. I think you're right about attitudes shifting as we get older - certainly this year more than ever before I've let go of long-held expectations and embraced the reality that what I have and do is enough. I'm so glad I found your and Michael's Substack, your posts are so touching and inspirational.
Good stuff!
very thoughtful essay, good to read.
I always love hearing about how our different childhoods can shape us in different ways. For Example, Scott didn't have financial security or stability growing up so he went into Law Enforcement. Arial had the "silver spoon" which gave her the freedom to "explore" in non-traditional ways.
My own childhood, being raised around wilderness and nature has given me a connection to the natural world that I love to explore in my writing, which even that part of my life (writing) is an expression of my childhood. You mentioned a bit about your happy marriage and successful group of friends, then going on to becoming a nomad (very cool), but I would have loved to hear how even more far back this idea of being a nomad went in your life.
I really enjoy your writing, it's simple, it's clear, it's straightforward and no hint of pretentiousness that I get from some writers. It's always interesting to me how when we release the grasp on being successful, or being witty, or being clever, how drastically our writing improves.
A lovely piece of writing. Scott and Arial are fortunate to have you as a friend.
So you have a good friendship with arial .